i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
