suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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