Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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