Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Randomize
