Whod you bang
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
