I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
