We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize