My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize