Cold hands, warm shart.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
