He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
