I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
