I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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