do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
