I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
The struggles of a small town man whore
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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