i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize