I am puke
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
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