I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
We were destined to go to rehab together
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
