you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize