No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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