Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he fucked my hip out of place.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
