Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
It's official drugs can't kill me
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
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THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
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We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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