The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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