Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
