fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
