My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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