am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
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It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
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Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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