i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
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