I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
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Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
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Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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