He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
