Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
