we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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