Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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