you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
