I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
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I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
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Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell