party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
