UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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