Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
