Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
