Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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