well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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