i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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