how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize