Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
there's paper in my vomit.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
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