Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
COCAINE IS GR8
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
