Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize