its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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