And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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