Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize