If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
