My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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