so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
