i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
